Infidelity, How Can I Mend My Marriage After An Affair

By: George Saunders

Without doubt everyone plans to have a long-lasting married life, full of happiness and great times. Infidelity is the furthest thing from anyone�s mind; however, the reality is that it can happen. In a marriage there isn't very much as devastating as an affair
<BR><BR>The Good
<BR><BR>When you fell in love with your spouse it was a feeling difficult to describe. There was a feeling that your spouse can do no wrong. Your married life was launched with a feeling of euphoria, looking ahead towards mutually working to achieve your dreams and ambitions with each others support while working towards mutual goals
<BR><BR>The Bad
<BR><BR>The Change
<BR><BR>As this scenario intensifies, most people are very aware of what their partner is doing that is harming the relationship, but very few look at how much they themselves are contributing to the situation. Of huge importance is that they do not openly sit down and discuss it. Once communication breaks down in a marriage both spouses gradually drift apart leaving an ever increasing emotional, psychological and physical gap that only grows wider with time.
<BR><BR>As this scenario goes on, most people are painfully aware of what their spouse is doing that is tearing apart the relationship, but almost nobody examines how much they themselves may be contributing to the situation. Of massive significance is the failure to sit down and candidly discuss what is happening between the two partners. As soon as communication becomes a problem in a marriage both spouses, with time, begin to drift apart creating an ever increasing emotional, psychological and physical gap.
<BR><BR>As a result both spouses drift apart leaving an ever increasing emotional, psychological and physical void which simply continues to grow.
<BR><BR>If the cheating spouse would stop and think about the tremendous hurt, pain and tears that the affair can cause, and reverse the roles just for a short minute, it is very likely that they would not enter into an affair in the great majority of the cases.
<BR><BR>The emotional damage inflicted by the cheating spouse is severe, heart breaking and extremely difficult to cope with. A fragile relationship has been shattered and the victim spouse emotions have been broken like a piece of fine china. Under the stress and confusion of the moment it becomes impossible to determine a rational next step.
<BR><BR>Most of the time, the reason behind infidelity is not that the partner who is cheating lacks deep emotional feelings for the spouse. The cause often is the result of emotional or physical needs which are not being met.
<BR><BR>The Consequences
<BR><BR>It is unfortunate but the spouse that is having the affair rarely stops to think of the devastation and pain that an affair will cause to the injured spouse. The injured spouse goes on an emotional roller coaster ride that affects not only family and friends but extends to the work environment as well. The hurt, resentment and shock leave the injured spouse feeling betrayed and broken inside.
<BR><BR>The injured spouse suffers through an emotional roller coaster developing feelings of low self esteem, sadness, feeling helpless and resentful and a myriad of other damaging aspects of the emotional spectrum. Under the weight of emotional stress and confusion it becomes nearly impossible to understand why it happened.
<BR><BR>As shocking as an extramarital affair is, the question arises if the marriage can survive this violation of trust. Is it reasonable or logical to make a decision based on emotion and risk throwing away all the years spent together without at least attempting to mutually pinpoint, recognize and resolve those things that ultimately triggered the affair? After all, you do have a lot of years invested in the relationship, and a wrong decision will always leave a question if that was the right thing to do.
<BR><BR>

Bio:
Take your next step and visit <a href=\\\"grski.com/marriage infidelity\\\"></a> to find out what you have to do and say immediately after the affair, and request free information to start mending your marriage. <a href="http://www.article-submission-express.com">Article Submission</A> by Article Submission Express